I want so much to open your eyes

'Cause I need you to look into mine

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I'm only hurting myself
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This past week, I walked 3 miles and did Shred twice. That's it. Oh yeah, and I'm smoking again. Damn it.

Miles walked: 23
Miles to Bree: 623

I'm not punishing myself for my failures... much. Instead, I'm focusing on making every day a little better than the day before.

On a completely separate subject, I've reacquired one of my old domains, and I'm struggling to relearn WordPress hacks. It's been years since I did anything of the sort, and I feel decidedly rusty. I'm not going to push it. If I get it up and working the way I want it in a few weeks, I'll be satisfied.

Plum blossom shadows
Yesterday was so blah. I didn't feel like doing anything at all. The only time I showed signs of life was watching the Kansas State and Wisconsin game. (K-State lost. Boo.) But, I did see the much-discussed full moon. It was lovely.

Today was the complete opposite. I did Shred, I walked 2 miles, and cleaned up my yard.

Miles walked: 20
Miles to Bree: 626

While I was walking around, I took some photos of the blossoms emerging all over my parents' side of the place. The bush cherries have burst into white clouds, and there are tiny blossoms on the plum trees. One of the apricots has already lost its petals, but another is in full bloom. The pear and peach trees are covered in buds that will open in a few days, and the apples are starting to bud out. Mom's crabapple trees already have lovely purple leaves, and my tulips are blooming. I love watching the earth reawaken in spring.

The moon is up:
Plum blossom shadows
Fall on my pillow.
--Natsume Soseki

...and I feel fine.
Yesterday I walked 3 miles, carted heavy stuff around for my parents, and lifted weights while watching the K-State game. This morning, after I found my motivation (oh, that's where I left it!), I did Shred.

My arms are mutinous.

Miles walked: 18
Miles to Bree: 628

Thanks to my mother, I've become hyper-aware of the end of the world as we know it news stories, etc. She's been watching documentaries, lectures, and so on, and then telling me about them. While I'm not really a believer in imminent world endage - in whatever form - I am a believer in general preparedness.

And I loved watching Jericho.

Dawn laughing
Did Shred today. I am SO out of shape, and I hate it. Walking later today.

I've found my motivation, and I'm running with it. Well, walking, and doing exercise DVDs, but still.
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Over the past few days, I've walked 7 miles. It seems like a lot, until I remember that I used to walk about 6 every day at work. Ah, well, it'll get better.

Miles walked: 15
Miles to Bree: 631

I've ordered my garden seed for this spring, but I have yet to figure out where everything is going. I know that the pumpkins are going in their own little patch, and the potatoes in another. And that the lettuce should be on the east side of the garden. But beyond that, I have no idea. I'm going to have so many veggies. I'm excited.

Two days ago, I had an interview at our local phone/cell/internet/tv monopoly. They're looking for another service dispatcher. I've never done dispatching, but I rock the customer service. I'm hoping for a callback soon.

The only big box bookstore in our area is leaving. Walmart owns the building they're in, and decided to double the rent. Idiots. So I snagged several books for 99 cents, and tons of movies. And three blank books that are absolutely adorable.

Two of the hardbacks I bought are absolutely horrible. They had interesting premises, but the writing was just so very bad. That was disappointing. I'm making one into a purse. The other is a smaller hardback, and I haven't figured out how I'm going to use it yet. Any ideas?

And finally, I watched the time spring forward last night, when I found a former love online. I hadn't intended to stay up so late, but he was there, and we talked for hours. I still love him dearly... Mostly as a friend, but he can still give me butterflies.

One week
This has been a stressful week... First, I find out that the nicest, most solid, dependable guy I knew in high school killed himself just after his 30th birthday. I can't wrap my mind around it.

The day after that, I learn that one of my former coworkers, who I liked very much, died of pneumonia. I'm doubly heartbroken.

Then, that evening, Steve gets a call from one of his uncles saying, "Remember when your dad died eleven years ago? You inherited the mineral rights to some land in north central Texas, but no one remembered to tell you." And that an oil company wanted to buy or lease said mineral rights.

Since then, it's been nothing but researching, and detangling the packet of legalese they sent us. It could be promising, but still stressful. Momma needs a cocktail.
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Winter and water
On Sunday, I walked a little more than a mile tracking down the cats to bring them in for the cold front. Conclusion: Their territory is too large, and too few of them come when called. I did succeed in getting them all inside, though.

Miles walked: 8
Miles to Bree: 638

Also, we're into Day 2 without water. Our pipes froze, and I spent over an hour last night bellycrawling under my house wrapping said pipes with heat tape. Fortunately, the faucet outside isn't frozen, so I can refill gallon jugs there. It's miserable work in the bitter cold, but it's better than nothing. Conclusion: Bellycrawling is a terrific workout, but unpleasant. Also, cold water, subzero temperatures, bare hands and metal faucets don't mix well.

And in the Fond Memories file, thirteen years ago on this day, Steve proposed to me. We've been ridiculously happy ever since.

Where's Fluffy?
Dawn laughing
Yesterday and today have been absolutely gorgeous. I walked 2 miles yesterday, and 3 today. Unfortunately, the weather's going to take a turn back to winter starting tomorrow. Boo.

Miles walked: 7
Miles to Bree: 639

On the up side, Steve and I watched Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist tonight. It's silly, but fun. And I want to see Where's Fluffy? in concert. *laughs*

We go... thataway!
Space Pirates
Since I'm restarting my walk to Bree, my goal is 646 miles. Today I walked 2 miles. That's not bad, considering I've done next to nothing for the past month.

Sidenote: I need to get a new sportsbra before attempting Shred again. Ouch.

Miles walked: 2
Miles to Bree: 644


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